My Responsibility

"My Responsibility"
--by David J. Bright
When she hung up the phone, she immediately burst into tears and grabbed out in
all directions for something to hold onto as she sank to the floor. I stood there
motionless, not knowing what to do, not knowing what to say, not even knowing what had happened. It wasn't until I answered the door moments later and saw the police officers standing in the alcove that I finally discovered what had taken place. My fifteen-year-old brother had been arrested. It was only ten days before
Christmas, a year ago today when it happened, but still I remember it like yesterday.
Robert had always been a rambunctious as a child – wild and lively, as my mom always said. He was constantly joking around, playing pranks, and causing mayhem, but his engaging personality and small stature always seemed to save him from the
firing line. This gave him the notion that he could cause any amount of trouble
without feeling the repercussions. As a youngster growing up in Ireland, he had
found few opportunities to get into a great deal of trouble. But four years ago at the
age of twelve, the rules changed for him when he, my mother and I moved to
America.
The same short stature that had been his ally in Ireland was now Robert's enemy in America. He was bullied and beaten on a daily basis. Since I couldn't be there all the
time, Robert sought the protection from others. By the end of his first year in
America, he had already joined a gang.
His appearance deteriorated, personality disappeared, and aggressiveness
increased, leaving him an angry, hollowed out, manic depressive. After a year or so,
his frighteningly self-destructive behavior and terrifying appearance forced my mom to send him to a suicide treatment center. There he received round the clock
attention, counseling, and medication for his depression and aggressiveness. He was released after a couple of months.
Only a few short weeks later, supposedly after mixing his medication with alcohol, he went out with his friends to go to the store. There they robbed, shot and killed a store clerk Robert, as an accomplice to the crime, was charged with armed robbery
and second degree murder.
Looking back now, I realize not what Robert had done wrong, but what I had done
wrong. I had taken no interest in his welfare, and I never intervened when he
needed me to. I just sat back and let it all come crashing down around me. It's in this respect that I guess I've changed the most. I'm now a much more involved person. I no longer allow things to just happen' I must be a part of everything that affects me. I'm also a more caring and better person. To make up fro what I did – or rather, didn't do – I look out for those around me, my family and my friends. I act
like a big brother to them to compensate for not being any kind of brother at all to
Robert.
The experience hasn't only made me better. In a strange way, it was also the best
thing that could have happened to Robert. He's turned his life around and is presently preparing to take the SATs in anticipation to go on to college, something the old Robert would never have done.
I guess it's sort of weird, isn't it. Such a dreadful experience can change an entire family's life, and how such a tragic situation could give birth to such great things. ANALYSIS
Bright's intensely personal essay shows us the positive outcome of what seems like an overwhelmingly negative experience, that is, the arrest of his brother. Through his talkative, intimate writing style, Bright is able to reach his readers because he does not take a sentimental or moralistic tone. The strength of this essay lies in its
honesty and its ability not only to criticize his brother, Robert, for his transgression,
but to reprimand the author for his, as well. What makes this essay so unique is that Bright finds himself at fault and demonstrates his personal growth from his mistakes, unlike most college essays that are highly self-adulating in nature. Through accurately assessing where he went wrong by not acting like a true brother to
Robert, Bright's piece is more impressive than most college essays.
Another great strength of Bright's essay is the maturity he displays by being able to take the blame for his brother's demise. This is a characteristic of a true big brother, one who knows how much his siblings admire and respect him, as well as value his judgment. Instead of harshly reproaching Robert for his crime, Bright turns to himself and how he "had taken no interest in his [Robert's] welfare." Furthermore,
Bright illustrates how he was mature enough to learn from his errors and improve
himself: "I act like a big brother … to compensate for not being any kind of brother
at all to Robert." Bright is able to see that there are positive aspects of this bad
experience and then applies them to his life; he shows to us that he is willing to change himself and make up for what he did not do for Robert by becoming "a much more involved person." In his essay, many aspects of Bright shine through: his maturity and strength, as well as his capacity to see a bright silver lining on what looks like a black thundercloud. Qualities such as these are ultimately the most important in terms of measuring who one is.
The only thing that Bright might have added to his essay is more of what happened
to Robert. We learn that Robert was arrested, and is now studying for his SATs and
preparing to go to college, but we are not told what happened to him between his
arrest and his self-improvement. How did Robert decide to turn his life around?
What challenges did he face? The second to last paragraph might need a little more
detail as to how Robert went through the process of becoming who he is today. Yet,
aside from this one minor comment, the essay stands on its own – it jumps out at
the reader for its uniqueness, for its quiet, yet powerful, personal revelations.